house_foreman | House/Foreman quotathon

cryptictac asked me to come up with a few quotes for the community, and I knew some off the top of my head--but it got me thinking about others, which I thought I'd put here for handy-dandy reference.

POISON:

Cameron: He's not addicted, he has to take drugs.

Foreman: The definition of addict.

Cameron: He's in pain--

Foreman: And addicted to painkillers. What a coincidence.

Cameron: You really never did any drugs?

Foreman: Now this is gonna be a racial thing.

Cameron: Deflecting a personal question with a joke. Gee, who do I know that does that?

Foreman: Yeah, I'm just like him. Except for the angry, bitter, pompous, cripple part.

Cameron: Maybe we should all pitch in and get you a nice cane. You’ve already got the matching gym shoes. [Foreman looks at his shoes.]

*

House [after eating expired tomato sauce]: I notice he didn't try to save me.

Foreman: I figured you were trying to make some kind of subtle point.

House: I was.

*

House and Foreman together: I’ll get all of them. [awkward pause]

Cameron: Great minds think alike.

*

Patient's Mom [about House and Foreman]: Oh, they’re the arrogant jerks that saved your life.

DISTRACTIONS:

Of course, the tender moment when Foreman heals House's migraine.

Foreman: Er, moving around is a bad idea. Hey, if you feel chest pain you need to let me know. Verapamil can cause congestive heart failure.

House: Nothing can hurt my heart.

*

FOREVER:

When House thinks that Foreman might have changed on him, and hates the idea:

House: Where are you going?

Foreman: To put her in a phenocoma.

House: What if I'm wrong? What if daddy's the drunk?

Cameron: Do you want us to give her the pheno or not?

House: I want him to argue his point!

Foreman: I assume you considered the father and ruled him out.

House: What's that saying where you ASSume you become a pain in the ass to me?

Foreman: Why should I argue? You'd just overrule me.

House: Enough! Get a pony or a watermelon farm!

Cameron: House!

House: I need him to react; I need him to act like a human being. I need him to get over this boring, near-death rebirth.

Foreman: I have changed. It's not something you get over.

House: Nearly dying changes everything forever. For about 2 months. 2 months is too long, I need the guy I hired back now.

Foreman: No matter how much your misery loves company, it's not getting mine.

AWWWWW.

Come and play! Add your own!